...the coffee diet?

so i was out of pants yesterday... i needed to do laundry really bad. i was down to sweat pants or pants i haven't been able to fit into since the beginning of the summer. well, i was feeling adventurous, so i tried the pants that probably weren't going to fit, except...
THEY DID! i was really shocked.
so then i thought... i'm gonna weigh myself, just for the heck of it...
I LOST 5 LBS -- THIS WEEK. that's INSANE.
the funny part of it is, i'm not really doing anything to lose weight... i mean, i've been eating less and drinking a LOT of coffee (iced, with a splash of milk, no sugar), but still...

anyway. i'm excited. i hope i keep losing 5 lbs a week, that'd be nice :)

yeah, and here's the best part...

it's february and i'm wearing tank tops, flip flops, and we had to turn the AC on. It's like summer, no joke.

don't be too jealous, though-- we've got a cold front moving in...
the high is only going to be about 65 for the next few days :)

Playground by Sia

Come with me to a place of fantasy
I’ll take you on a sea-saw
Come with me to a place that’s by the sea
I’ll take you on a board walk
Take my hand I’ll take you to the sand
You and me will build a castle
Ready set go I’ll race you to the wall
I will win I am the fastest

I don’t wanna grow old
Bring me all the toys you can find
You don’t wanna grow up
You can be my partner in crime

I’ll be sure to write you from the war
Put your guns away it’s tea time
Water bombs and tea towel tired mums
Looking for a little me time
Close your eyes and count to thirty five
You may never ever find me
Close my eyes and then I realize
You are never far behind me

I don’t wanna grow old
Bring me all the toys you can find
You don’t wanna grow up
You can be my partner in crime
I don’t wanna grow old
Bring me all the toys you can find
You don’t wanna grow up
You can be my partner in crime

Let’s have fun, let’s play out under the sun
Will you take me by the hand
Let’s see how far we can run, yeah
Let’s play chase let’s put make up on our face
You can catch me if you can
We can make a secret place

from Manfred by Lord Byron

" MANFRED
The lamp must be replenish'd, but even then
It will not burn so long as I must watch.
My slumbers-- if I slumber-- are not sleep,
But a continuance of enduring thought,
Which then I can resist not: in my heart
There is a vigil, and these eyes but close
To look within; and yet I live, and bear
The aspect and the form of breathing men.
But grief should be the instructor of the wise;
Sorrow is knowledge: they who know the most     10
Must mourn the deepest o'er the fatal truth,
The Tree of Knowledge is not that of Life.
Philosophy and science, and the springs
Of wonder, and the wisdom of the world,
I have essay'd, and in my mind there is
A power to make these subject to itself--
But they avail not: I have done men good,
And I have met with good even among men--
But this avail'd not: I have had my foes,
And none have baffled, many fallen before me--     20
But this avail'd not: Good, or evil, life,
Powers, passions, all I see in other beings,
Have been to me as rain unto the sands,
Since that all-nameless hour. I have no dread,
And feel the curse to have no natural fear
Nor fluttering throb, that beats with hopes or wishes
Or lurking love of something on the earth. "

[i find myself seeping through the cracks of 18th C. /early 19th C.
British literature...

maybe it's because that, along with Art history, are currently my
only literary intake,
but i cannot help but linger upon my keen desire for Gothic literature.
Not the depressing,
suicidal screams for help as most people associate with the word "Gothic,"
but rather it's
actual meaning, and it's actual influence on art, both visual and written.
Not a scream, but a whisper--
A Dark corner in a vibrant landscape of sublimity--
a battle of God, spirituality, and self.]

[I am in everything I read. I am in every piece of artwork I view,
thus, the wonderful result of being blessed with a creative soul. ]

my two cents...

thanks to Andy i have something to appease my boredom and inability sleep...


Two names you go by… Desiree and Miss Desi :)

Two things you are wearing right now… yoga pants and a tshirt with my initials on it.

Two things you would want (or have) in a relationship… trust and respect sound pretty good to me!

Two of your favorite things to do… paint and be outside in the sun

Two things you want very badly at the moment… to be done with gen-ed classes and to hug my mamma.

Two pets you have or have had… Louie and Fleck / Phoebe and Peanut

Two things that you did last night… ate at Juan's Flying Burrito and watched the Italian Job

Two people you think will fill this out... nobody.

Two things you ate today… leftover Juan's for breakfast and eggs for dinner :)

Two people you last talked to… Nick and Casie

Two things you’re doing tomorrow… Finishing a painting and CRU prayer meeting

Two longest car rides… Detroit and West Palm Beach

Two favorite holidays… Christmas and Thanksgiving

Two favorite beverages… Coffee and water

Two people no longer alive who you’d like to talk to… Jesus and Marilyn Monroe... we'd all three have coffee together, for sure.

"Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez"

..."Let the Good Times Roll"...


(me and casie)

so, i was selfishly upset because i wanted to go to a ton of parades the last few weeks, but couldn't because i had the boys. well, monday night the boys' grandpa watched them and i went with Merri Kay and Jane to Krewe of Proteus and Orpheus uptown on St. Charles and it was AMAZING. First of all, it's an awesome community event-- seeing a ton of people out doing the same thing you are, waiting to see the same parades... it's hard to explain, but there's such a sense of unity. It's pretty easy to just strike up a conversation with complete strangers here in New Orleans anyway, but at parades it's even easier. We were camped out in front of Jane's friends' house, so we not only had access to a clean bathroom, but free food and drinks! We had some red beans and rice, grabbed a couple beers, and stood for 3 hours with our arms in the air screaming for beads. I ended up with a BUNCH. it was so so so so fun! Not to mention the floats are BEAUTIFUL. I was going to take pictures, but i was too excited to stop and pick up my camera.
THEN on Mardi Gras day the boys and i went over to their aunt and uncle's house, which is blocks away from the main parade route in Metairie (more "family-friendly" parades). It was a blast. Their cousin, Casie, Aunt Arlene, and I all got new orleans' famous daiquiris, and just had a great time with the family. The parades went from noon until about 5. . . it was crazy but SO fun. I caught a lot of beads (including some really cool ones), a stuffed animal, a garter, a foam "captain morgan" hat, and a purple, green and gold feather boa. It was such an amazing experience!!! I cannot wait until next year. I mean, i've always read and heard that Mardi Gras is an awesome time to live in New Orleans, but i didn't realize just how much until i was a part of it.
Needless to say, though, it was rough getting to class this morning. Mardi Gras recovery is the worst part... and the fact that UNO is the ONLY school down here that actually had classes today. I showed up for my first class... but i totally didn't make it to my second one. I went home to eat lunch during my break and ended up falling asleep. Oh well. it's the first class i've skipped since i've been at UNO, i don't think it'll kill me.

on a different note, i'm ready for my two weeks off. Bill is supposed to be home tomorrow (please, God), and i am absolutely beyond ready. i feel like i've been working for more than two weeks... i guess it's because the boys have been acting out more. And Mitchell's been sick. and Will's been deaf... excuse me, i believe a better term would be "selective hearing." *rolls eyes*
count it all joy. count it all joy. count it all joy...

i'll be back in st. louis in 8 days! ya'll better warm it up for me... i can't handle any more of that cold nonsense.

i. need. a. break. NOW.

I AM SO FRUSTRATED I CANNOT EVEN SEE STRAIGHT.

Today started off ok... i got to go back to bed after i took the boys to school and slept for a couple hours before heading to class. I even finished my computer science lab super early and headed over to the UC for lunch with my friend Jessica. It was all really great until after lunch... i headed to the grocery store close to campus to get a bunch of stuff we needed at the house. Halfway thru my shopping, Bill calls me, and asks me if i can go get Will. Apparently Will had an early release day today, but did not inform me, and instead called his dad and told him I wasn't there to pick him up. Wow, that looks really good, huh? I just told him, I was sorry, that Will didn't tell me, etc... so i guess that went over fine.
But the boys have been pretty disobedient all day, the dog is annoying me, i can't go to a parade tonight with my friends because i don't have anyone to watch the kids, and to top it all off, i baked chicken for dinner-- a whole chicken with cornbread stuffing (i didn't do it myself-- i bought it like that, lol). I baked it for about an hour and a half, spent time making mashed potatoes and green beans, and then... the boys don't want what i made. I AM SO MAD. I had to practically force Mitchell to eat it, and Will won't. There's nothing more frustrating than spending time on a meal for someone, only for them to tell me it's gross and they don't like it and they don't want it. I told them too bad, so sad. Eat what i made or don't eat at all, kapische?

i need to paint. i'm gonna turn on a movie for the heathen children, lock myself in the back, and exert some internalized aggression.